Dear Pennies & Pens,
As you all know, I relocated to Dallas from Houston back in November. Prior to that, I lived in several different places because I grew up in Cincinnati, went to college at Hampton University in VA, then I moved to New York where I lived for 5 years before moving to Texas.
In essence, I literally have friends everywhere because I have friends in all the places that I’ve lived. Additionally, a lot of my friends have moved around too, so I know people in California, Maryland, Florida, North Carolina, Louisiana, Georgia, etc.
It’s pretty cool because I always have somewhere to visit and someone to stay with while I’m there. Plus, I get to hear about life outside of Dallas, TX which I like because although I adore Dallas, I think it’s important to know what’s happening in other places.
With all these moves of mine, I have realized that real friends are EVERYTHING. Real friends help you move for free, real friends take you to work when your car is in the shop, real friends tell you if those pants make you look fat, and real friends will ask if you are okay to drive home. And if you’re not a real friend pays for your uber or cab.
But sometimes things aren’t so cut and dry. Life isn’t always black and white. Sometimes, there’s grey areas. Like maybe your friends can’t help you move because they don’t live in the same city as you, or they can’t give you a ride to work because they don’t have a car, or maybe they don’t think the pants look good on you but they’re scared to tell you and risk hurting your feelings. And what if they can’t pay for your cab home because they’re broke? Does that mean they aren’t your real friend?
To dig even deeper, what about the person you’ve known since middle school…is that really your best friend forever? Or is it your sorority sister or frat brother? It could also be your biological brother or sister that’s your true BFF. Sometimes, it’s a current or former co-worker that’s your ride or die. You could also be best friends with the girl/guy who lived down the hall from you in college or your college roommate.
With all these options, how do you know who your real friends are?! And when certain life situations happen…things like getting engaged, married, having a baby, losing a parent, getting divorced, landing a new job, or starting a business, how do you know if this person has your back? Well that’s the messed up thing, Pennies & Pens, it’s up to you to decide and figure out who your real friends are. No one can do it for you.
The reason why is because we all view life, love, and friendship differently. And since we view things differently, there are things that some people feel are acceptable while others would completely disagree. In essence, my suggestion is that you think about what you want from a friend so you can find or surround yourself with people like that. You should also think about the type of friend you want to be because if you want to receive something then you have to give it.
To help get your juices flowing, I created the real friends test so you can start to figure out who your real friends are. Take the quiz here: The Real Friends Test
And there it is. de la Pen…All Pen Everything. With us, keeping it real never goes wrong.
